Book Summary
Why does time fly? A guide to slowing down time in midlife | The book ‘Slowing Down Time’
Do you feel like time is slipping away? ⏳ As we age, why does it feel like years pass in the blink of an eye? This common phenomenon in midlife is a perceptual illusion, explored in depth in the book “Slowing Down Time: A Guide to the Gentler Passage of Time in Midlife“. If you are looking for scientific and practical ways to live a more conscious and profound life, this video and book are for you!
Join us in this video to discover:
- The Scientific Reasons Time Speeds Up: Why does our brain process time faster in midlife? (The illusion of time, fewer ‘firsts’, the mathematical perspective)
- Breaking the Routine Cycle: How can we make life more exciting by creating new experiences (new hobbies, short trips, meeting new people)?
- The Power of Mindfulness: How can simple meditation practices and being present in the moment help us wind our inner clock?
- The Treasure Trove of Memories: What is the role of documenting and reviewing memories (journaling, photo albums) in slowing down the passage of time?
- Reconstructing Life’s Story: How can we find a deeper meaning in life by looking at the past with a fresh perspective?
This book not only answers your questions but also, using real-life experiences and actionable exercises, helps you take the rudder of your life back into your hands. Learn how to live time instead of just passing it, and turn every moment into a valuable treasure.
Get your copy of “Slowing Down Time” now and begin your journey towards a more conscious life!
#SlowingDownTime #ConsciousLiving #Midlife #TimeManagement #Mindfulness #Psychology #PersonalDevelopment #HowToSlowDownTime #CreatingExperiences #Memories #BetterLife #MentalPeace #NewBook #VahidZekavati
written by Vahid Zekavati
Copyright: NLP Radio
Introduction
Time, the most elusive truth of existence, becomes a mystery for us in midlife. How is it that years pass like the wind, and we are left as mere spectators? This book is a journey inward; a journey to discover the reasons behind the acceleration of time and to find a way to live more mindfully. “Slowing Down Time” not only answers your questions but also, through real-life experiences and simple exercises, shows you how to turn every moment into a valuable treasure. If you are tired of life’s frantic pace and want to regain control of your life’s rudder, this book is for you.
Chapter One: Why Does Time Get Ahead of Us?
Have you ever had the experience that when you look back, your childhood seems very long and full of events, but the recent years have passed as fast as lightning? It’s as if our internal clock has sped up its ticking in midlife. This phenomenon is actually a perceptual illusion, an interesting error in how our mind processes time. We might think that physical time is changing, but the truth is that we ourselves, and the way we interact with the world around us, have undergone a transformation. In this chapter, we will go to the roots of this feeling.
One of the biggest reasons for this phenomenon is the loss of “firsts.” Think about your childhood: the first time you fell off your bike, the first time you gave a speech at school, the first time you went on a camping trip. Each of these experiences was an exciting and unique milestone. Our minds would register these moments with full detail, because every new thing was important to it. These “firsts” acted like nails on which we would hang our memories, and for this reason, time seemed longer, as it was full of “firsts.”
However, upon reaching midlife, our lives move towards monotony. You might wake up at a specific time every morning, take the same repetitive route to work, and do the same usual tasks in the evening. Your mind no longer feels the need to register the details of these repetitive events. This causes days and weeks to pass by without us having any special memories of them. As a result, a year in midlife can feel like a month in childhood, because the number of milestones and distinct memories has drastically decreased.
Another important factor is the mathematical perspective. When you are ten years old, one full year is equivalent to ten percent of your entire life. This amount of time, for a child, is very vast and significant. Therefore, each year is long-lasting in their memories with many events, such as changing classes, summer holidays, and family happenings. But at the age of fifty, that same year constitutes only two percent of your life. Logically, our minds subconsciously consider its importance to be less.
This change in perspective causes each year to have less weight and importance. For this reason, in midlife, it is not strange for us to say, “It feels like it was just yesterday that…” and refer to an event from several years ago. This feeling is because in our minds, we measure years based on a percentage of our entire life, not on the actual number of days and hours. This phenomenon is a logical and mathematical reason for the feeling of time accelerating.
Furthermore, habits and routines play a significant role in this illusion. The human brain automates repetitive patterns to conserve energy. This process is similar to turning on an autopilot on an airplane. Instead of thinking about the details of every task, we perform it in the background. This mechanism is useful in normal conditions, but it causes time to pass faster.
If you pay attention to the things you do every day, you will see that many of them are done without needing to think: brushing your teeth, driving to work, or preparing dinner. These routines do not occupy enough space for new experiences to enter your memory. The result is that weeks, months, and even years are registered in our minds as a single, seamless block without any remarkable events.
This is where routines, with all their benefits, become the enemy of our mental peace. They cause our lives to drift into monotony and make us feel that instead of living, we are just passing time. For this reason, it might be time to take another look at our habits and see if we can change these repetitive patterns so that our minds can start registering and storing moments again.
For example, think about the lives of people like Nikola Tesla. As one of the greatest inventors in history, he was always experiencing and discovering new ideas. His mind was engaged with fresh problems and challenges, and for this reason, every day was a new experience for him. This inquisitive mind makes life full of memorable moments and events, and time passes more slowly and productively.
In short, the feeling of time accelerating is not due to a change in physical clocks, but rather due to a change in how our minds process memories and routines. By being aware of these reasons, we can gain a better understanding of this phenomenon and regain control of time by changing our lifestyle. This awareness is the first step towards a more conscious and productive life.
Chapter Two: Can We Make Life Exciting Again?
Many of us wake up every morning with this question: “How will this day not be like the days before?”. This is a question that hides a deep suffering from monotony and repetition. It is as if the clock of our lives is filled not with new moments but with the repetition of old ones. To escape this mental prison, we must consciously decide and do something so that our brain starts to register and store valuable memories that emerge from this uniformity. This is where the role of creating new experiences becomes prominent.
The first step on this path is learning a new hobby. Maybe you always wanted to paint but never found the opportunity. Maybe as a child you dreamed of playing the guitar but never pursued it. Today is the day you can turn that dream into a reality. Your brain wakes up from hibernation when you learn a new skill and forms new neural connections. This not only gives your life a new purpose but also turns each practice session into a new milestone in your memory.
Learning a new language can also have such an effect. Imagine a week where you are learning the first words of a language; your brain is full of fascinating challenges. This effort to learn makes time seem longer and more productive. When you look back, this week is not just filled with a series of routine tasks, but with the energetic memories of trying to pronounce new words. These events add new tick-tocks to the clock of your life.
Small trips are another solution for breaking these routines. You do not need to travel around the world and spend a fortune. A day trip to a nearby village, or even exploring a new neighborhood in your own city, can completely change your perspective. Open your eyes to new sights and sounds. Pay attention to the people, architecture, and small details you see along the way. These trips, despite being short, are registered in your mind as unique events.
These trips create memories that will stay in your mind forever and distance themselves from the monotony of your daily life. For example, recall the story of Paulo Coelho, the famous Brazilian author. In his midlife, after a turbulent life, he decided to take a pilgrimage walk to Santiago de Compostela. This journey, despite its many hardships, created new experiences for him that not only changed the course of his life but also became the source of inspiration for many of his works.
Furthermore, meeting new people can completely change your world. Every person is a story, and every story is a new experience for you. By participating in cooking classes, photography workshops, or local book clubs, you can meet people who share similar interests. These new connections not only pull you out of isolation but also give you the opportunity to look at the world from a new perspective.
You can also volunteer for a charitable cause. Helping others and spending time with people who are different from you can have a profound effect on your mood and your perception of time. This work gives you the feeling that your life is not limited to yourself but is part of a larger flow. This sense of worth mentally slows down time and makes moments more meaningful for you.
These are just a few solutions for creating new experiences. The important point is to consciously step out of your comfort zone. Instead of just repeating your daily tasks, look for events that challenge your mind. This conscious choice allows you to “live” instead of just “pass” time.
In the end, it is never too late to start something new. Even if you are in midlife, you have the opportunity to fill your life with new adventures. Every small step on this path helps you regain control of your perception of time and feel life with more depth and joy.
Chapter Three: How to Manually Wind the Clock of Your Mind?
Have you ever had the feeling that you are not living, but merely passing through life? This feeling is a pain that stems from ignoring the present moment. Our minds, like an airplane in flight, are often on “autopilot,” thinking about the past or planning for the future, and for this reason, they neglect the beauties and details of the current moment. This neglect causes days and years to pass by like a fast-forwarded movie.
To exit this state, we must consciously decide to return to the “here and now.” This return is what is known in psychology as Mindfulness. Mindfulness teaches you to direct all your senses to the task you are currently doing, without judging it. This practice is not a complex process, but a simple choice. A choice to live the moment instead of just passing through it.
The first and simplest mindfulness practice is meditation. You do not need to sit for hours in a quiet, serene place. It is enough to consciously focus on your breath for just a few minutes a day. Breathing is something we always do, but we rarely pay attention to it. By focusing on your inhale and exhale, you disconnect your mind from scattered thoughts and return to the present moment. Over time, this practice will make the “present moment” a mental habit for you.
Another powerful practice is conscious attention while doing daily tasks. Every day, we do things that we have become accustomed to and do without thinking. For example, when drinking tea, instead of your mind being preoccupied with work or family issues, pay attention to the delightful smell of the tea, the warmth of the cup in your hand, and its taste in your mouth. This simple act turns an ordinary experience into a valuable and lasting memory.
Another exercise you can do is paying attention to your surroundings while walking. Instead of getting lost in your thoughts, pay attention to the sound of the birds, the feeling of the breeze on your skin, or even the color of the tree leaves. This attention makes you step out of your inner world and connect with the external world. This connection strengthens your sense of belonging and presence and makes you feel that time is moving more slowly, because every moment gains more meaning.
These exercises help you enjoy your daily life and feel it more deeply. For example, consider the story of Steve Jobs, the founder of Apple. Living in a world of technology and speed, he always emphasized simplicity and attention to detail. His philosophy of minimalism was, in fact, a type of mindfulness. Instead of getting caught up in complexities, he focused on the core of everything, and this focus led to the creation of revolutionary products that centered on simplicity and user experience.
These practices teach us that the beauty of life is hidden in its details, and it is up to us to discover them. The point is that we must see these details. For example, if you consciously look at the sunrise or a flower in your garden every day, you will realize that each day offers you a new experience. This attention turns life from a mechanical process into a beautiful adventure.
By practicing mindfulness, you not only slow down the passage of time but also find more peace in your life. This peace stems from your awareness of the present moment and allows you to deal with problems and stresses more effectively. When you reach this awareness, the future is no longer a source of anxiety and the past is no longer a source of regret.
So, to start, it is enough to put this book aside right now and pay attention to one of the things around you. To the sound of the fan, to the sunlight streaming through the window, to the warmth of the laptop in your hands. This is a choice, a choice to live, instead of just passing time.
In the end, practicing mindfulness is like building a muscle. The more you practice, the stronger you become and the better you can live in the present moment. This ability is the most valuable tool you can have to combat the illusion of time’s acceleration. With mindfulness, you can manually wind the clock of your life again.
Chapter Four: How to Store the Past for the Future?
Do you also have the feeling that your memory has become like a sieve full of holes? Many of us in midlife feel that the important moments of our lives simply escape from our minds. This is a pain that stems from the lack of conscious registration and preservation of memories. To combat the illusion of time’s acceleration, we must transform from a passive “consumer” of moments into an active “creator” of memories. This chapter will teach you how to build a valuable treasure trove for yourself by registering and reviewing memories, which will give you a deeper understanding of the passage of time.
The first and most important step is a daily journal. You might think this is a cliché or childish, but its effect on your mental health and your perception of time is amazing. Every night before bed, write a few lines about the most important events of that day. This helps you distinguish your days from one another. Instead of the entire week being a seamless and vague block in your mind, each day is registered with a specific event. This conscious registration is like placing a marker on the path of time and makes you feel like you are not in freefall.
A journal is a personal treasure trove that allows you to have a dialogue with your inner self and review both pleasant and unpleasant moments. Writing about daily events helps you better understand your emotions. Also, over time, by reading your previous writings, you will realize how much you have grown and what paths you have taken. This gives you a sense of progress and depth in life that makes the speed of time more understandable for you.
Creating a photo album is another powerful way to register memories. Photos are the visual document of your moments and immortalize a memory in a small frame. Instead of keeping hundreds of photos on your phone that you never look at, periodically print important photos and create an album. These albums are not just a collection of images, but a book of life that you can refer to at any moment to review your memories.
Remembering the story of Salvador Dali, the famous surrealist painter, can be inspiring for us. He, who lived a life full of details and special moments, always used his memories and dreams to create his works. He subconsciously registered the details of his life and immortalized them in his art. This process connected him to the past and allowed him to use past experiences to create a new future.
Let’s go back to the photo albums. When you review them, you not only recall past memories but also connect with the feeling of “here and now.” Reviewing a photo from a holiday can bring back all the feelings of that day: the smell of the sea, the sound of the waves, or the feeling of peace under the sun. This makes that moment “come alive” again in your mind.
In the end, reviewing memories reminds us that our life is full of valuable moments, even if they are lost in the daily routine. This gives us hope that the future can also be full of new and beautiful memories. This hope is a strong motivation to continue and create new experiences.
These actions help your brain better store the days and reduce the feeling of time’s rapid passage. When your brain has more distinct memories to store, the days no longer dissolve into each other, and your life, instead of being a monotonous path, becomes a winding and exciting road.
Journals and photo albums are not just tools for documenting the past, but a guide for the future. They teach you that every day has a new story to tell and that you, by documenting them, give your life more meaning and depth. These treasures are, in fact, a way to fight against forgetting and the illusion of time’s acceleration.
Chapter Five: How Does the Past Shape Our Future?
Sometimes we feel that our life is a collection of unrelated events that have no order or meaning. This feeling is a pain that stems from our inability to see the “big story” of our lives. To combat the illusion of time’s acceleration and find a deeper meaning in midlife, we must transform from a passive observer to an active narrator and rewrite the story of our lives. This chapter will teach you how to not only revive your memories by reviewing the past but also give your life meaning and direction by gaining a more integrated understanding of the path you have traveled.
One of the most powerful ways to do this is to review memories of childhood and adolescence. Looking at old photos, flipping through family albums, or even talking to family members about shared memories can help you relive moments that you have long forgotten. This is like opening a treasure chest where the important and influential moments of your life are hidden. Each memory is like a puzzle piece, and by putting them together, the big picture of your life becomes complete.
This review not only awakens a sense of nostalgia in you but also allows you to see where you have come from. Perhaps in the past, you faced challenges and failures that you thought were insurmountable. But today, by looking back, you can see how you overcame those challenges and became the person you are today. This process gives you a sense of growth and inner strength and reminds you that you are stronger than you think.
Writing a short biography is another tool for reconstructing the story of your life. You do not need to write a complete book. It is enough to write a short biography of different periods of your life, from childhood to today. This helps you see the events of your life as a single, continuous story. In this biography, you can refer to milestones, important decisions, and the lessons you have learned.
When you write your life as a story, you realize that every event, whether good or bad, is part of a larger narrative. For example, the story of Oprah Winfrey, the famous television host and producer, is inspiring. She faced many problems and challenges in her childhood, but instead of letting those experiences define her, she turned them into part of her success story. She used her past as a source of strength and showed millions of people how to reach the light from the darkness.
This process allows you to take another look at your past and realize that every moment of your life, whether small or big, has a special value and meaning. Perhaps a small moment in your adolescence had a big impact on your later decisions. By rewriting the story of your life, you discover these hidden connections and give your life more meaning.
This also helps you let go of past regrets and resentments. Instead of being stuck in the past, you can use it as a source of inspiration for the future. When you see the story of your life from the perspective of a narrator, you realize that every decision and every experience has brought you to where you are today. This understanding gives you peace and allows you to face the present and the future with more confidence.
This process not only helps you reconcile with your past but also allows you to draw your future path with more awareness and confidence by better understanding yourself. This is a powerful tool to reduce the illusion of time’s acceleration, because it reminds you that every moment is a new chapter of your life’s story.
Chapter Six: A Hopeful Future; Ask Yourself…
Now that we have reached the end of this book, I want to remind you that this journey has just begun. This book was only a map, and the real path is in your hands. In every chapter we passed, we arrived at the truth that the control of time’s speed is in our own hands. This control is gained not with magical powers but with awareness, choice, and small daily actions. This journey is a journey to live more consciously and deeply, a journey where you live time instead of just passing it.
On this path, you may feel many times that you have returned to old habits and that time is passing with acceleration again. This is a natural occurrence. The important thing is not to give up. Every moment is a new opportunity to start over. Just remember that every day is a new book to write and every moment is a new memory to create. This is where you need to ask yourself questions that will determine your direction.
There are two key questions that can be your compass on this path. The first question: “What new thing do I want to try today?”. This question is your gateway to the world of new experiences. Perhaps that thing is reading a few pages of a book that has been gathering dust on your desk for a long time, or maybe a short walk on a different path from your usual one. The important thing is to consciously create a new experience every day.
The second question: “What moment do I want to register in my memory today?”. This question takes you out of a passive state and turns you into a conscious photographer of moments. Instead of letting valuable moments pass by, pay attention to them. This could be a beautiful sunset, a pleasant conversation with an old friend, or even the feeling of peace after a tough day at work. This conscious registration helps your days to be registered in your mind as valuable memories instead of merging with each other.
These two questions give you the power to take control of your perception of time. Instead of letting time push you forward, you set the course for it yourself. This choice gives you a sense of mastery and peace and turns you from a free-falling traveler on the path of time into a conscious pilot. This change in perspective is what can slow down the passage of time for you.
For example, consider the story of great artists like Vincent van Gogh. In his life, he turned every moment into a deep experience. Although he had a difficult life, every sunrise, every pot of flowers, and every look at the night sky was a unique experience for him that was immortalized in his works. By doing this, he turned every moment into a meaningful event and resisted the acceleration of time.
Your life can also be like a work of art. Every day is a blank canvas that is filled with new colors and fresh experiences by your conscious choices. This is not a heavy responsibility, but an opportunity; an opportunity to create a masterpiece that is only in your hands.
In the end, remember that this journey is infinite and has no destination. The goal is not to arrive somewhere specific, but to enjoy the path you are on. This enjoyment is only possible when you live in the present moment consciously and with your whole being.
So, start right now. Take a deep breath, allow yourself to feel the present moment, and ask yourself: “What moment do I want to register in my memory today?”. By answering this question and acting on it, you have taken the first step to slowing down the speed of time.
Book Review: The Art of Living in Midlife
We began this journey with a simple question: Why does time pass faster in midlife? In Chapter One, we answered this question and realized that the acceleration of time is a perceptual illusion. We learned together that this feeling is not due to a change in the physical speed of time, but rather due to a change in how our minds process it. The decrease in “firsts,” a shift in our mathematical perspective on life, and getting caught in a cycle of repetition and habit were the main reasons for this phenomenon.
In Chapter Two, we presented a practical solution to combat this repetition. We learned that by creating new experiences, we can help our minds create new “milestones” again. Whether through learning a new hobby, taking short trips, or meeting new people, our goal was to break free from monotony and give our days new meaning.
In Chapter Three, we journeyed inward and became familiar with the concept of mindfulness. We understood how, through simple exercises like focusing on our breath or paying attention to the details of daily tasks, we can turn off “autopilot” mode and return to the “here and now.” This chapter showed us how to enjoy and feel every small experience more deeply by being fully present in the moment.
In Chapter Four, we explored the importance of registering and reviewing memories. Through the ideas of keeping a daily journal and creating a photo album, we learned how to build a valuable treasure trove of our moments. This not only helps us remember the past but also ensures that our days are recorded as separate, meaningful events in our minds instead of blending into one another.
In Chapter Five, we delved into the “story of life.” We understood together how by reconstructing and reviewing the past, we can find a bigger picture of our journey and give our lives meaning. This chapter reminded us that every moment, good or bad, is part of a single story, and each has its own unique value.
Final Conclusion
“Slowing Down Time” is a book about fighting an illusion; an illusion that makes us feel like life is slipping through our fingers. At the end of this journey, we have come to the realization that time is not a fixed flow but a personal experience. This experience is shaped by our choices, our awareness, and our presence in every moment.
You hold control of this experience in your own hands. By creating new experiences, practicing mindfulness, and consciously registering memories, you can not only slow down the pace of time but also feel life with more depth and joy.
This is not the end of the book, but the beginning of a journey to live, not just to breathe.
